Physical boundaries for chaste dating
These girls weren’t the female equivalent of the Deliverance boys either, they were perfectly upstanding but they went with the worst lot you can imagine.
I was taken a bit aback not just by her interest but how she seemed to be demanding it, and didn’t give it to her just because it made me uncomfortable.
Instead she gave me her number and pretty much demanded this time that I call her that night. This wasn’t ignoring boundaries, this was someone who was into you and telling you – in pretty much no uncertain terms – that she wanted to invite you over for a hot cup of “fuck my brains out”. Little did I know that people were taking this as a challenge or whatever, and were not sincerely listening to me when I told them I wanted them to fuck off.
Even at that age I was skeeved right the fuck out not by her forwardness but just how she lacked any notion of boundaries, so I didn’t call her. Now, if you’re not into women who’re forward, cool. I couldn’t figure people out back then or the reason they did things so I just thought there were those who were naturally forward and those they preyed on, and if you didn’t want to be fucked with, you gave them a whole lot of shit to get them off your back. I was definitely the outcast in high school, that guy who was bullied relentlessly, so when these girls were interested in me, I just thought they were pitying me and I felt dirty for it.
Even in school, a few of my dear fellow male classmates liked how baby-faced I looked back then and groped me more than a few times.
I’m grateful that I was born a boy and not a girl, because I don’t want to imagine the kind of shit that would have happened to me otherwise.
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These are the times when it’s time to head to the lab, see what’s on the slab, and then get elbow deep in it’s guts to see where things went wrong. More often than not, it calls for a mix of tough love and a liberal application of The Chair Leg of Truth. Once you get past a time when being marriage was less of a way of sealing contracts or property exchanges and people started marrying for love and companionship, that’s exactly how it works.